We'll All Probably Be Dead Soon

May as well start wearing sweatpants. Admit that your first concert was a Nickelback show and you still have a box set. Go ahead and eat at Arby’s. It’s all coming to an end.

We’ve officially entered the maw of the sixth mass extinction event in the planet’s history. At least those are the findings of pretty legit researcher Paul Ehrlich, the Bing Professor of Population Studies in biology and senior fellow at the Stanford Woods Institute for the Environment who says a conservative 75 percent of species will be wiped away by an increasingly toxic environment. Ehrlich announced the beginning of the end as a plea to save at least some of the planet’s species, along with ourselves, as the window is rapidly closing.

Scientists were already in agreement that species are disappearing on levels about as high as they did when dinosaurs stomped the tera, but there was more uncertainty we’d actually entered a true mass extinction event. Ehrlich left a glimmer of hope that if we all pulled together and made drastic changes we might still pull out of the death spiral but I’m guessing most of us already have a mouthful of Beef’n Cheddar.