Entertainment

The Cast of 'Silicon Valley' Crashes Global Entrepreneurship Summit

"You've got to think 'glo-cally.'"

by Dyani Sabin

The stars of the HBO show Silicon Valley have crashed the Global Entrepreneurship Summit, a conference they have deemed “glocal” — both global and local — for an orchestrated dose of celebrity.

“You would think global and local are opposites and combining them means nothing at all, but you’d be wrong,” Kumail Nanjiani, who plays Dinesh on show, told the audience gathered inside the Memorial Auditorium at Stanford University.

After taking a few photos with the crowd, they jumped up on stage to explain several of the seminars to the crowd, awaiting President Barack Obama and Google CEO Sundar Pichai.

“Impact Investing: Houseboat or Brunch” was the first seminar on the list. When the crowd was asked which the audience believed it was — houseboat or brunch — people started raising their hands, to the amusement of the cast.

“How much more tact could you be: I believe it’s a houseboat, quipped T.J. Miller as he mocked the crowd.

“What is more of a wealthy luxury problem than deciding between those two things? asked T.J. Miller. “Is it a lunch that is also breakfast, or do we own a boat that we can live in?”

After their bit on seminars, it was time to tell the crowd about startups. Zach Woods offered this piece of advice: “When you are pitching your company you have to address to ‘neveryone’ at all, which is both everyone and no one at all.”

However, it was Haymitch, an 11-year old who has developed four apps — three of which related to the climate impact of littering and one about dealing with autism — who stole the show. After Thomas Middleditch, Woods, Nanjiani, and Brener told secrets about Silicon Valley — all involving bedwetting – Millers secret hit it home. “Today, I met an 11-year old who intimidated me.

And as they exited the stage they gave the crowd pitching advice. Make sure you are wearing a large amount of four-five to different types of cologne. Find the biggest VC in the room and hit them. When you get to a VC, speak very quietly. And, if you don’t have naturally sweaty palms, dip your hands in water, oil, or honey to increase your handshaking power.

“Continue to invest in the future of tech worldwide,” Miller yelled as they left the stage. “Think glocally, not locally.”

Probably advice Pied Piper could use in the next season.